And In The End…: My Final Word on the Eraserheads Reunion

I just wanted to get in one last entry - my final word on the whole Eraserheads thing before moving on to other stuff. Yup, it’s been a week already, but the aftershock of that concert could still be felt all over the internet: On blogs, mailing lists, forums, and on YouTube. Heck, it could still be felt beyond the internet: On the radio, on TV, on print, during conversations with friends, and during a lot of tiny gigs by those bands who were inspired by the ‘Heads.

I’m writing this just to get it out of my system. At least majority of it, if not totally.

That previous post was just the raw ramblings of a fan fresh from a musical high. This one hopefully is something that does justice to what that event really meant.

By now, we all know what went down on that historical night a week ago. It was a musical event with a magnitude so great that thousands of lives seemed to have stopped or slowed down in anticipation of it. And as the music started, everyone was transported back in time - a decade and a half ago - to when my generation was still in its formative years.

I actually caught on to the Eraserheads relatively late. It was in 1994 when the song “With A Smile” hit the airwaves. It officially became the song that I first fell in love with.That tune was what inspired me to take up playing the guitar. It didn’t take much convincing for papa to buy me a guitar since he’s also a music lover - and he self-taught himself how to play the instrument - so I guess he could relate.I remember us buying this simple acoustic nylon-stringed guitar from a Lumanog store in Cubao for around 1,000 pesos; and by the time we got home, the first thing I did was to struggle through the chords: G-Am-Bm-C-D. As I followed the chord patterns in the songhits, I realized that my small 11-year-old hands couldn’t fret the strings just yet, so dinaya ko nalang by playing only the treble strings… but it sounded fine. Eventually, I was able to play the entire song properly, and then I started moving to other songs. Then I bought more songhits, listened to more songs and studied how to play tunes by other bands. A few more years down the road, I took a shot at writing my own compositions. But a lot of times through the years, when I hold a guitar and just jam, my hands tend to go back to those chords, as if by muscle memory, like it was my default chord pattern: G-Am-Bm-C-D. “Lift your head, baby don’t be scared…”"With A Smile” was also the song that implored me to buy my first record: A cassette of “Circus”, which is still intact although very much worn and torn. No, it wasn’t something I saved up for (as much as I want to claim that it was). I asked papa if he could buy me the tape, and after some convincing… he did! My dad rocks \m/ Sa SM-Cubao namin binili yun for 100 pesos. So, having gotten what I wanted, I waited patiently like a good little boy for my parents to finish with their shopping and other errands before we could go home.

As soon as we got home and I got through the front door, I raced up the stairs, went inside my parents’ bedroom, tore off the plastic packaging, loaded the tape into the player and then pressed “play”. It was bliss. After that, I would occasionally save up from my grade/high-schooler baon/allowance just so I could buy more records. I religiously bought every Eraserheads album that came out after that (except the last one, because I was bummed that they were already breaking up).

Then I branched off to buying the records of their contemporaries such as Rivermaya, Yano and Color It Red. Then the band scene died down a bit so I started exploring the foreign music scene. Then the age of the internet came and mp3s spread like wildfire. But nothing was quite like listening to Ely, Raymund, Marcus and Buddy. Aside from them, the only other four people whose songs I really know by heart are named John, Paul, George and Ringo. But tagalog songs dig into my soul a lot deeper. They feel more honest and warm. Parang kaibigan mo lang o kamaganak na nagku-kwento. There’s a certain sense of familiarity and normalcy that can’t be matched.

Ultimately, The Eraserheads started my love affair with music and their songs figure heavily in the soundtrack of my youth. I’m not a fan. I’m a fanatic. It’s a crazy, obsessive and incomprehensible musical love. Their songs aren’t just songs. They’re windows to the past. They stir up emotions and bring back memories.

So last weekend, in that hot and crammed-up field, it was a heartwarming realization to have, knowing that thousands of other people felt the same. We all felt it in varying degrees and it manifested in different ways, but it was same basic feeling: A love for the music and a deep appreciation for the four guys who created it. On that night, it didn’t matter kung sino ka. There were musicians, actors, politicians, writers, bums, rich people, poor people, old and young… but everyone was stripped bare to a single unifying identity on that night: We were all simply fans of The Eraserheads.

Even until now, the feeling won’t go away. Especially after reading all these testimonials, interviews and news items by the named and the nameless entities around the internet, it’s a musical high that ceases to decrease. It was like a dream. It was surreal. Goosebumps galore. It was a privilege being there. It’s one of those feelings that you either understand or you don’t. If you don’t, no amount of explanation will suffice. If you do, no amount of explanation is necessary.

It doesn’t even matter now if they do it again. Anything after that night - even though it was cut short - would pale in comparison.

It doesn’t even matter now if they come together as a band again. A big part of me actually doesn’t want them to. Maybe I’m selfish for feeling that way, but The Eraserheads were the 90’s. This is a different time. It would just dampen their legendary status, enigma and mystique if they reformed. One big grand night of mass karaoke senti-tripping is enough. Kahit bitin, at least nangyari. Kung mauulit, ok lang din at pupunta pa din ako. But I wouldn’t expect it to match the energy and excitement of last weekend.

Now that I look back on it, it wasn’t actually the band performing for their audience throughout the concert. It was a communal experience of the fans singing back the band’s songs to them. As Raymund put it when he recalled those last few seconds before they rose from beneath the stage: “I could feel the love, it was pure love.”

Gaya nga ng sabi ng Beatles: “And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”